Monday, November 19, 2007


How do others do it? The always-positive, overcoming-the-obstacles attitude? I assume they overcome obstacles of course...maybe they just love what they do. Maybe they live in perfect worlds. Where does that come from?

It doesn;t seem to matter in the slightest to me...and yet somehow deep inside, it does. The 'it' being the emptiness. When other people disappoint in proprotion to the disappointment you hold in your self, what's a lad or a lady to do?

What you love, you shouldn't. What you should love, seems unable or unwilling to throw you a line. Even when you are surrounded by your best friends, there's an impatience. A desire for something else, something more perfect. Something new.

But the desire is drained of the energy for action. An architect without paper, a builder without a hammer...or worse, all the tools available, sitting unused. Saved up for the someday that was yesterday.

Mountains unclimbed, trails unpacked...the way they will stay.

If this is step one burn out, then I am toast.